If there is any sex toy that everyone needs, it is a sex swing. The sex swing is a popular target for jokes and internet memes, but truth is, it is the ultimate orgasm maker!
- Who Buy Sex Swings?
- Types of Sex Swings
- What Makes a Great Sex Swing
- The Best Sex Swings
- Adding Accessories. More Excitement
- Installing A Sex Swing
- Sex Swing Safety Tips
- Sex Swing Positions
Who buys Sex Swings?
I am kind of an expert on swings and so I have Google Alerts set up to notify me anytime someone posts a new webpage mentions sex swings. Every once in a while I see a post where someone enters a forum or Reddit and ask “Should I buy a sex swing?” or “Who has used a sex swing?”
The typical response is “That's what biceps are for” and then everyone jumps on the bandwagon and talks about their muscles. I just picture a bunch of keyword warrior internet badasses that have never actually had sex let alone used a sex swing. I do not care who you are, if you are an NFL lineman and your girlfriend is a 90-pound girl, there are positions you can not hold her in that can be easily accomplished with a sex swing.
Sex swings are for anyone that wants to explore new positions. But typically, the average sex swing buyer is between the ages of 35 and 60 and involved in long term relationships with an above-average income. Many are empty nesters and all of them are looking to add variety to their sex position repertoire. Basically…. the normal couple next door.
Of course, that does not mean swings do not work for other people as well. Over the years we have sold sex swings to countless swingers, dungeons, clubs, movie studios (porn and non porn), young people, and old. We have sold swings to those with disabilities looking to get more freedom and in one case we sold a swing to a widowed man that could not remarry, but found the companionship of a real doll and needed to support her.
So when someone asks me “Who buys sex swings?” The answer is YOU. If you have ever thought of a sex swing, there is a lot of joy you can get from it.
Types of Sex Swings
There are a lot of types of swings. If you are a freak like me, you just buy them all. But for the average user, we should probably narrow it down so you can find a swing that will do what you want it to do.
Sex Swings can be categorized into three distinct groups: Standard Sex Swings, Door Sex Swings, and Sex Slings.
A standard sex swing is made up of a couple straps and stirrups. These straps support your butt, back and legs as you hang in an elevated position from the ceiling or a stand. This is the most common type of swing.
A door swing usually consists of 2 stirrups to support your legs and in some cases a strap to support your butt. These swings install from a door. The door serves as a support for your back.
A sex sling is a large solid piece of fabric, leather or wood that supports your entire body like a hammock.
What Makes a Great Sex Swing
Obviously, a great sex swing is a swing that allows you to do amazing things. The more positions you can explore the better. But what is really important is the comfort of a swing. There are a lot of sex swings that are just not comfortable at all. Yeah, you might be able to have kinky sex, but if you can't finish in 28 seconds, the person sitting in the swing is going to be miserable. That is just not fun. So a truly GREAT swing is one that you can use for hours.
The secret sauce for comfort is all about weight displacement and the width of the swing.
If a swing is wider, it will be more comfortable. Narrow swings tend to squeeze your hips and that becomes uncomfortable for plus size people. Wider is better.
Weight displacement means that the most surface area the swing is touching your body, the less pressure there will be. Think about sitting on a rope. This puts a lot of pressure on your but. Then think about sitting in a hammock. This is very comfortable because the weight is displaced.
The Best Sex Swings
Using the criteria above, I have selected the best sex swings for your to try. Now full honesty, these are not always the cheapest swings available. You can find some real shit on Amazon. I have owned them and they just suck. But if you only want cheap, here is my piece on cheap sex swings. I hope that you continue on here for the list of quality swings.
Screamer Sex Swings
When it comes to sex swings, there are no better swings than the Screamer brand. It is every part of the swing. The quality of the sewing, the hardware, and the webbing are all far better than others. The design is based on 4-inch webbing and the swing is much wider than any other making it far more comfortable.
Plus there are the smaller details. These are the only swings that come with handles. They are also the only swings that come with storage bags. Even more, they are one of the only swings that are machine washable.
So all around, these swings are the best. But which one do you choose? There are actually a couple of options for the Screamers.
The Screamer Dual Hook is a swing that requires two mounting points and it is the most popular selling sex swing by far. The fact that it is two mounting points allows you to install the swing very wide which will add more comfort, especially in your hips. Plus having two mounting points rather than one gives some people more comfort by spreading the weight out rather than having it hang from a single point.
The Screamer Twist is a single mounting point swing. This allows this swing to spin which is a popular feature that some people really enjoy. The reason we do not normally recommend single mounting point swings is that they are much narrower in the hips than a dual hook swing. But the Screamer Twist has a bar that is 32 inches wide. This makes it very comfortable on your hips. For comparison, most swings are only 21 inches wide and the Whipsmart is only 14 inches wide.
Screamer Dual Hook with Bondage is very much basically just the dual hook with cuffs. This does not sound like much but it is a great option. The other bondage swings from companies like Fetish and TLC are very narrow single hook swings with low-quality padding and even lower quality cuffs. Basically, they are not that comfortable at all and even with light bondage, the cuffs can break. So the dual hook with bondage fills a very big gap in the market. It is the highest quality swing with the addition of leather cuffs to complete the bondage experience.
Wild Side Sex Swings
If you are willing to give up a little on comfort to save a buck, I would recommend the Wild Side. It is a dual hook swing like the Screamer which means it will fit good on your hips. The webbing is narrower so it loses a little in comfort, but it uses fairly good padding.
The Wild Side is available in 4 colors and has a great price. It does not have all the fancy features like the Screamer such as handles and a bag, but it is a lower price.
Wild Side Sex Swing$99.00
Whipsmart Pleasure Swings
Fetish Deluxe Door Swing$54.00
Screamer Leather Cuff Set$109.00
Beam Mount (2 pack)$11.00
Over the Door Mount$15.00
Screamer Twist Sex SwingSale!
Tied Tight Post Ties$12.99
Tied Tight Bed Restraint System$39.99
Wild Side Bed Restaints$24.99
Firefly Pleasure Kit Blue$50.00
Firefly Glass Tapered Plug Medium Clear$30.00
Tied Tight Platform Swing
The platform swing from Tied Tight is unlike any swing. It is a rigid framed swing made from stained hardwoods. There are a lot of reasons we love this swing including the fact that it shines in the doggy style position. This is something that is very difficult or impossible in any other sex swing.
In addition to being a great sex swing, this swing is ideal for bondage and BDSM. It includes several mounting points for attaching your favorite cuffs.
Fetish Deluxe Door Swing
I do not really like door swings. I prefer to use a real swing any time I can, but I do know there are cases where that is just not possible. So if you need to use a door swing, go with the Fetish Deluxe Door Swing.
I have tried all of the swings and there are some that are cheaper than this, but I absolutely would not recommend those at all. Many of them are made with such cheap materials they are flat our dangerous. Others are made with at least OK parts, but they do not have a main strap to park your ass on. This means your entire body is hanging from straps around your thighs. This is just painful and/or awkward and I do not recommend it.
Fetish Deluxe Door Swing$54.00
Adding Accessories for More Excitement
A good sex swing is just the base. Like anything, there are always accessories you can add to enhance the function or make things easier.
Sex Swing Headrest
This is listed under accessories because it is not included with any sex swing, but I do not consider this an accessory, I consider this a requirement.
Without a headrest, you will be forced to support the weight of your head in a variety of weird positions. This will be very tiring and painful on your neck.
It does not matter if you bought a $80 or $300 swing, this is the single biggest thing you can do for comfort. It should be noted this is not needed for door swings or slings. In those cases, your head is supported by the door or the sling.
Sex Swing Headrest$19.00
There are bondage swings but they suck. OK, that sounded harsh, but that was really actually nice for what they are. The only swings made specifically for bondage have shitty foam passing and even more shitty velcro cheap cuffs. So I recommend a different approach. But the swing you want and buy this cuff set separately.
This cuff set is the same one that comes in the kit above for the Screamer dual hook plus bondage kit, but you can also buy it for use with other swings. A lot of swings will not have a place to attach these cuffs so you just need to look at the swings and decide if they will work.
Normally cuffs like these will work best when combined with any Screamer swing, The Tied Tight platform swing, or a leather sling. These swings will all have sufficient amounts of chain or metal hardware to attach the cuffs to.
These cuffs are made from leather and include adjustable webbing straps.
Screamer Leather Cuff Set$109.00
If you want to get more out of your swing, consider the squatting attachments. Squatting sex is a currently trending sex position made popular by porn movies and it looks great, but the reality is that it is extremely difficult for women and leads to pain and burning thighs. This is where the squatters come in.
Unfortunately, these only work with Screamer, Wild Side and Whipsmart swings because they work by using parts on your existing swing. But if you have one of these swings, the squatting attachment can add a lot of fun for $20 which is a far better option than something like a sex stool at over $100.
Squatters provide equal to about 50 pounds of lift giving you much more control for this great position by using the mounting points, handles, and stirrups from your swing.
Not everyone that wants a sex swing can install it in their ceiling. A swing stand is a common alternative, but those are expensive and not everyone has space. This is where installation accessories can help you out.
Beam mounts work great for installing a swing if you have exposed beams in your house, basement, or garage. They also work great for the really adventurous people that want to install them over a tree branch when they go camping. Just loop the strap over a beam and hook the swing to it and you are ready to go.
Door Mounts are an option that works for people that want to install a swing in a hallway. If you have 2 doors across from each other you can use door mounts with a dual hook sex swing to install it. Of course, if you do not have 2 doors lined up, you can install one side of a dual hook over a door and the other on a hook screwed into the wall. When you are not using the swing, just hang art on the wall hook.
Sex Swing Stand
If you do have a room for a sex swing stand, the only real choice is the Screamer swing stand. Ok, well there are others out there, but you do not want them. The reason being that the Screamer stand is the only one that works with single and dual hook swings. It also folds smaller than the others and has a storage bag. And to top it off, it works great if you have any bondage desires. There are 12 bondage points on the legs and the 3 at the top for hooks giving you plenty of ways to tie up your sub whether they are in a swing of not.
Screamer Sex Swing Stand$399.00
Installing a Sex Swing
Installing a sex swing is always an issue. Often even the bigger issue is how can I install it discreetly so that nobody knows you have a sex swing. My question is why? I am pretty sure that everyone knows you have sex, especially if you have kids. But anyway, there are a lot of ways to install a sex swing. A few of them I included above with the beam mounts, door mounts, and the stand. But there are even more options.
My personal favorite is to use a chin-up bar. I do not use this method all of the time because I have lots of ceiling hooks, but I also travel a lot and a chin-up bar makes a great portable swing option without needing to use a door swing.
Sex Swing Safety Tips
Sex swings are usually pretty safe, but there are a few things you can do to ensure you stay safe.
- Buy quality swings. There are some real shitty swings out there. They are often recommended by other bloggers because they have never used them, but they offer a commission if they make a sale. So these bloggers recommend some real shit and do not even know it. Some indications that the swing is not a quality swing:
- The swing is an extremely cheap price.
- The swing has unreasonable weight limits like 600 or 1000 pounds.
- If you look at the images closely you notice it is not the same swing in each image. This shows they are stealing images and you never know what you will receive.
- It is shipping via E-packet shipping. This means it is being dumped on the market by someone buying the lowest priced product possible and shipping it directly from the manufacturer in an envelope, and not a legitimate store.
- Inspect the swing before each use. Look for loose stitching or damaged plastic or metal hardware. Swings can get broke, hardware can be stepped on or slammed in doors. Damage happens. Watch out for it.
- Never adjust a sex swing when you are sitting on it. This can cause very sudden movements and that fast movement and jerking motion can put a ton of strain on the parts of the swing thus damaging or weakening it. If you are in a swing, at a minimum, use the other straps to life all of your weight off the strap you want to adjust. This usually takes 2 people.
- Used the springs. Do not overload the springs and upgrade them if needed. But spring will provide a dampening effect on the parts of the swing. Just like adjusting the swing with weight in it, not using a swing will make increase impact forces on parts of your swing and wear it out much faster.
- Use professional installation. If you are not 100% certain in your ability to install a swing, hire a professional. It is a very simple job and should cost under $100 if you hire a local handyman. Safety is important so don't take chances.
Sex Swing Positions
When I am working live chat on my websites, I am asked daily about positions for the swing. People ask this like there is a right and a wrong way to use a sex swing. Well, there is not.
Get creative. You don't always want to have sex in missionary position in your bed, so you try things. Same thing in a swing. Explore. Some things work, some do not and give you a good laugh. Have fun with it.
But to get you started with a few ideas, you can check out this video. This is by no means the limits. Also keep in mind that different swings have different features thus different options for positions.