Small Dicks and Massive Dildos: What’s Average Size?

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Size has been a hot topic around the office for the last few weeks. The size of toys, the size of men, the sizes women like and the perception of size. The one conclusion we have come to is that dildos are big. All of them. And truthfully bigger than girls like. So what gives?

In fact, when we were working with realistic dildos the other day we realized just how hard it is to find a normal-sized sex toy. For over 98% of women, it would be extremely difficult to find a dildo that is the same size as their husband. Dildos are just big.

Penis size - girth or length

But having said that, I am satisfied in bed, but when I am looking for a toy, I am looking for a toy that can really fill me up. For me, that is not length, it is all in the girth. In this, I am not alone. I recently posted the question to members of several active groups and the results were that 100% of women that responded would rather girth over length- every single time.

I know this is what I prefer, but I was shocked at how one-sided the voting was, especially considering the marketing of dildos. When it comes time to buy a sex toy, toys are always marketed for their length and not their girth. The box will say “9-inch realistic cock” and then on the back near the bottom, they may add a 6-inch circumference like it is an insignificant feature and many times not list it at all. Really, it is the feature women care about most!

What is the average penis size?

My husband is a data-driven person- to the point of annoyance but still it is beneficial in situations like this. He likes things measured, in charts and with data to back it up- the gray area is never ok with him. So when the question of size comes up, he goes straight to google and starts digging for studies. Quizzing me on my knowledge of length, circumference, who posted studies, were they clinical studies, how many men were involved and was there any correlation with any other part of the man's body- height, shoe size, hand size… anything… His digging is endless. So the fact that my lady friends are saying girth but everything in packaging says the length- do women even know the average-sized penis is? I am getting drilled this question over and over by him.

I operate a little different. I like to ask my girlfriends and anyone else that is online. So I head for Facebook. I literally can't take the data rush and the overload of charts and graphs and studies and… you feel me? I post the questions in all of my inappropriate or adult only women's groups.

What size is the average size penis of the men you have been with?

The Facebook Results

So the results start coming in. Dozens and dozens of people telling me their opinions on the average penis size.

  • “I need a man that is at least 7 inches”
  • “For the men I have been with, I would say 6.5 inches is average”
  • “I can not be with anyone less than 8 to 10 inches”

So these are only a few quotes, but I do not think there was a single comment from a woman that thought the average was less than 6 inches and all needed a size larger than 6 inches to be satisfied. I also noticed that despite 100% of the women on my other question saying that girth was more important than length, but, when asked about the average size of men, none of them mentioned girth at all.

The Science Data

So I bring all of my “data” to my husband and he looks at me like I have lost my mind. No, like ALL women have lost their minds. This sends my husband into an utter spin of literal confusion on women. Like, how in the world can this be? In one question women are saying girth over length but in the very same question, just worded different, not one mention of girth and 100% of women say they have been with men with larger than average penises. And not just a little larger, MUCH LARGER!

Here is the data! Women's preception of penis size is not even close to reality!

My data driven husband enters his numbers and charts and facts and studies and….. hold on- it is kinda interesting and you didn't have to do the rescearch!

So the first thing he does is to pull out this chart.

This comes from analyzing several studies that measured over 15,000 men's erect penises. And more important than that, in their analysis, they removed studies that included self measurements. So all 15,000 of these were measured by professionals, not their girlfriends in a Facebook group. I roll my eyes at him….

So he shows me the far right-hand side of the chart. It stops at 21cm. 21 cm is equal to about 8 1/4 inches. A man that is 8 inches erect is in the 99.9 percentile. Even at a small 6 1/4 inches, a man would be around the top 2% of all men.

So then he asks me this. If a man is a 1 in a 1000 size if he reaches 8 inches, how is it possible that these women have multiple or several partners at or over 8 inches and up to 10 inches? How can someone think the average is 6.5″ when that is the 98 percentile? Statistically, if this data is true, the average woman would have to sleep with 3,000 men to encounter 3 men with an 8-inch penis. Ladies, I am not making this up. It all comes down to numbers and I can't argue.

OK, so I don't know what to say. There is clearly something wrong here. Either all the studies with thousands of men and their hardons are wrong about the average penis size of men or women are really bad at knowing the size.

My husband, of course, thinks that the data is right, I am thinking, maybe these girls just got really lucking at finding the men with small baseball bats in their pants *shurg*

Are Perceptions Distorted?

Well with such an apparent difference between what the average penis size is and what women believe it is, there must be some other factor going into this.

Penis Enlargement Marketing

An obvious place to start is looking at marketing. It does not matter who you are, you have received spam emails, seen ads or other advertisements for penis enlargement. It is extremely common in these ads to talk about getting an 8-inch penis or even mentioning that the average is 7 inches. Over years of constant repetition, it starts to sink in.

These are hugely profitable items and they control the narrative. Men everywhere looking at these numbers think that 7 inches is average and they look at themselves and they are nowhere close to it. So maybe they should buy this stuff to please the women. The truth is that none of it works and nobody needs it. You can read more about penis enlargement techniques.

Big Penis Porn

The next obvious place for influence is porn. Everyone knows porn is not real. But seeing it over and over somehow convinces people that it is real. This is the same way people can fall for things like political propaganda. All the different sides just keep repeating a message over and over. It does not matter if it is 100% accurate, as long as you get enough exposures, you will believe it.

So when you want porn and constantly see large penises, you eventually start feeling that is normal. Trust me, it is not normal. They do not throw just anyone in a movie and put them on YouPorn, they only put the best of the best. The biggest of the biggest. Just like they do not put any average Joe on an NFL team or in a blockbuster movie, they do not put men with average penises in porn. Sorry ladies.


As I mentioned at the very beginning of this post, dildos are big. They are so big in fact when we are looking for items for our store here, it is difficult to find anything with an insertable length of fewer than 5.5 inches. But 5.5 inches is at 60 percentile on the chart above average for the size of men. So even the smallest dildos are longer than the average man. I know, it is so confusing. So misleading.

Yeah, I know you don't have to insert a dildo to the hilt if it is too long, but the girth is a different story. Just like the length, the smallest dildos and vibrators come with a girth that is larger than the average man's girth.

To help steer people towards reality and make them see more accurately how big sex toys really are, on this blog we have made charts that we include with all the dildos we sell. The dildo below is represented in these charts compared to the size of the average man. It is pretty to see how extreme these toys are. But even with these charts, this is an average size for a sex toy. There are many toys on this site that go off the charts to the large side.

Does Size Matter?

So here is what we know.

  • Women are really bad at knowing the average size of men
  • Dildos are all larger than the average size of a man's penis

Well according to this study, 85% of women are satisfied with the size of their partner. At the same time, 45% of men think that they are small according to this other study.

So considering all these factors, what conclusions can we make?

Point 1

Men are insecure about their penis size. They think they are small and that is reinforced by marketing and porn and women not understanding the average man's penis size. Women think the average penis is bigger than almost any man is, I mean literally 98% of men don't even scale on the what women think is average. Women buy toys much bigger than any man is. So what is the man to think? Unfortunately, he thinks he is unsatisfying to his partner. But yet 85% of women say they are satisfied. Maybe they are not telling their men they are satisfied? Maybe men are not believing it because of this marking gimmick?

Point 2

Women say that they are satisfied with their partner, but they think that the average is much bigger than their man and they purchase toys much bigger than their man.

The Science Conclusion

Ok, after weeks of pouring over every study available, we have not been able to find any real reason to explain these differences. The best that science has to offer is that women are stimulated either physically or mentally. When a woman is with a partner she loves, she can be stimulated to climax emotionally. When she is using a toy, she must rely on physical stimulation.

They tried to back this up to studying preferences between women in short and long term relationships. Women in short term relationships preferred to have men with larger penises. They speculate that was to make up for the lack of emotional connection.

My Husbands Conclusion

Of course, my husband has his own theory. He said that size does matter to women. A LOT. He says that the sex toy industry is a multi-billion dollar industry and they would not sell toys if they do not sell well. He said there are no 5-inch dildos, but there are a lot of 9-inch dildos. This speaks to what women want and buy.

He believes that size does matter to women and they really love the feeling of very large toys and would prefer very large men if they were possible. But since 85% of men are within one inch of average that is just not reality. So they have become accepting of what is available and would never say anything that could hurt their partner. Yes, they may be able to come to a mental orgasm with their partner, but wouldn't they want a much larger penis to stimulate them physically so they can climax from both physical and emotional stimulation. Why would they want an either/or?

My Conclusion

I think women have a mental idea of what size is and will visually go for the big toys. But that is not what their vagina craves. Large toys are hard, very stiff and don't move like a human penis even if they try to make them look like one. The closest I have found is RealCock Sliders to an actual realistic feeling and enjoyable dildo. Women love the feel of their man's penis inside them. Truly nothing can compare, definitely not a dildo. So, a toy has nothing to do with our desire for a man's size. It is just a toy. Possibly a challenge to take something so large.

My husband has given me permission to explore anything I desire from buying massive sex toys to buying a well-hung real doll to finding myself that porn star or hung cabana boy. But so far, after 20 years, I have played with some fairly large toys but never felt the need to go beyond that. And to me, the fact that I have permission and have never taken up the offer is proof that he is wrong.

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